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Reasons Why Women Are Saner Than Men

1. If you see people who have paid good money to stand in an outdoor stadium on a freezing December day with nothing on the upper halves of their bodies but paint - those people will be male.

2. If women were in charge of all the nations, there would be virtually no Military Conflicts and when there were, everybody involved would feel just awful and thre would soon be a high-level exchange of thoughtful notes written on flowery paper...followed by a Peace Luncheon.

3. Men invented words like "wedgie" and "noogie".

4. Men think the following things are hilarious: cat-kicking, fart contests, a two minute, sound barrier breaking belch.

5. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Questions Your Girl Will Eventually Ask You And The Correct Answer To Them.

What would you do if I died?

Correct answer: "Dearest Love, in the event of your untimely demise, life would cease to have meaning for me and I would hurl myself under the front tires of the first eighteen-wheeler that came my way."

Do you think she is prettier than I am?

Correct answer: Remember the "she" could be an ex-girlfriend, a passer-by on the street or an actress in a movie you just saw. The ONLY correct answer is " are much prettier!

What are you thinking about?

Never tell the truth....
A)How big Pamela Anderson's breasts are,
B)What lie you could tell to get out of the house and go out drinking with the boys, etc.

Correct answer: "I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful , beautiful, intelligent woman you are and what a lucky guy I am that you picked me out of all the men in the world that you could have had."

Do you love me?
Correct answer: "More than life itself."

Do I look fat?
Correct answer: "No." For men who feel that they must elaborate, you may say; "Darling, don't be silly. If anything, you are too thin!"